Feeling stuck in a rut and in need of a change is an incredibly common feeling. In fact, as we mature and age, this feeling will intensify as we find our priorities and motivations change. Finding you’re at a fork in the road can be an exciting time full of possibilities, and today’s guest, Sheree Clark, has built her midlife around this concept.
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Sheree didn’t always live and breath change and helping other women in midlife as a health and life coach, but she has embraced this role. Originally, Sheree actually owned an advertising agency with her partner that ran for 25 years - until her relationship ended, too. She was faced with a choice: continue with what she knew or branch out and try something different.
Now a healthy living coach, TV presenter, accomplished author, and aspiring speaker, Sheree helps us all learn how to truly appreciate life and teaches us how we can find insight into all the lessons life has brought us. In fact, Sheree actually specializes in raw food and how to overcome career burnout - both incredibly important topics for our physical and mental health.
On this episode of Couch Talk, we’re talking all things change. How do you know when it’s time to make a huge life-changing decision - because knowing when is one of the hardest things to figure out. Sheree also gives us her best method for connecting to your heart and truly listening to find out what it wants to do. She also encourages us all to set up informational interviews with the women who inspire us.
Perhaps most importantly, she talks about the difference between feeling stuck with where you are in life and actually feeling content with where you’re at.
Have you been feeling stuck and not sure what to do about it? When’s the last time you made space to truly listen to your heart? How have your motivations changed as you’ve gotten older?
In This Episode:
- How to know when you need to start doing something else with your life
- How to ask and listen to what your heart what it wants
- What an informational interview is and how this can help you find your authentic voice
- Why our motivations change as we age
- How to know when you’re at a fork in the road
- What the difference between feeling stuck and content is
Subscribe to Couch Talk w/ Dr. Anna Cabeca on Youtube
Quotes:
“I loved it until I didn’t, and when I didn’t, I decided I needed to do something else.” (2:06)
“I think it’s okay to feel done with things.” (8:45)
“When we don’t feel our best, we can’t be our best.” (16:22)
“I want to be the best I can be in this body because it makes me smarter and funnier and happier and better to be around.” (17:31)
Links
Grab your Free Gift: What the Fork are you Waiting for?
Find Sheree Clark and Fork in the Road Online
Follow Sheree on Facebook | Instagram
Transcript
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
Hello everyone, doctor Anna Cabeca here for Couch Talk, an intimate place for intimate conversation. Today I have Sheree Clark with us. She is from Fork in the Road, and we're going to be talking about how we can really appreciate our life and find the insights that our life experiences have made possible for us that we're bringing now into our daily life. So let me share with you a little bit about Sheree, she is a healthy living coach, a TV show host, an inspiring speaker, as you'll soon see, an accomplished author. Sheree has written and presented on topics ranging from raw food 101, to overcoming career burnout. And she appears in a weekly segment on Casey WI, channel 23 called Fork in the Road with Sheree Clark, while maintaining a busy practice coaching clients one-on-one and in groups on attaining optimal health and creating an authentically fulfilling life.
Also, of a side note, Sheree has her cat Lotus and in their spare time they work on their yoga poses. Sheree, it is really great to have you here with us today. I'm excited to be here with you. To talk with you about this mission that you're on, this process that you've put in place, and the creatives that you've come up with, and I can already see from your room, and you're coloring that, it's going to be a colorful presentation.
Sheree Clark:
Thank you, Anna. It's a pleasure to be here.
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
Well, tell me a little bit about your journey that brought you here and brought you into this Fork in the Road mission.
Sheree Clark:
Absolutely. So I didn't start out in this space and that's one thing that's important, I think for listeners to know. As much as it is my journey may be interesting, it certainly is to me, the important thing to catch about it is, is that there were twists and turns and forks in the road at every step in the way, and there are in everyone's lives. So mine started out, I was first generation college, and I went to undergraduate and graduate school and graduated and got a job, and my first job was at a university, and I moved 1500 miles to take that job. I loved it until I didn't. And when I didn't, I decided I needed to do something else. And what I ended up doing was starting an advertising agency with a person who ended up being my life partner at that period of time as well.
We did that successfully for 25 years, and it was really kind of a repeat. There were patterns in our lives. I loved it until I didn't, and when I didn't, it was time to move to something else, and I didn't know what I was going to do next, I just knew that I couldn't do that anymore. I couldn't own the advertising agency with the person who had now become my ex. So you can, there's a whole another segment there, we'll have to do. So I ended up deciding that I wanted to do something with women individually, regarding their health. So I started as a health coach that morphed into being a life coach. And now my specialty is women at midlife, and I define midlife as approximately 40 years old and there's not an end date on that. So it's women who have reached a certain point in their life journey when they feel like they're at the midpoint.
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
Yeah, I think that's beautifully said and I like the concept of helping people redefine themselves and really get into their gifts at this stage of our life. And I think that's the liberation of this transition, this hormonal transition we call the perimenopause or menopause too. I think there's liberation in that and that discovery. So what have, what are some of the things that you discovered at that transition point that led you to really empower others and help them along the road?
Sheree Clark:
Oh my gosh. Well, how long do we have? The discoveries are that as women we fall into whether we start that way or not, we fall into a pattern of care giving. I don't have children, I never did. So for me, the care giving part wasn't as being a mother, it was, I was an employer, remember I owned an advertising agency for 25 years. So I had employees that I care took, because it was an advertising agency, I had clients I care took those. When your parents get a little bit older, you're in that role. I was a community volunteer and still am. So your care taking the people on your community. We're doing all these things and giving, giving, giving, and it's wonderful. Don't get me wrong, I love it. I'm not lamenting, I'm not a victim, but at some point or another, we cease to remember to fill our own cup.
And when that happens, it turns into instead of something that we just do, it becomes the defining factor of us. And we feel, I think, sometimes like we've built this cage, whatever, and we don't think we, there's a way out of it because we find ourselves saying things like, "Well, I've always," you know, fill in the blank, whatever the always is. I've always chaired the church committee for this or that, or I've always filled this role, but we change, and we have to allow ourselves to change and celebrate that. And sometimes that means letting go.
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
Yeah. Those are challenges, right? The things that we have to let go, sometimes it's not doing more, it's doing less. And that can be really frightening because I know you hear this like as I do, "Well, I'm too old to do this now," Or, "It's too risky to do this now." So how do you address those objections?
Sheree Clark:
Well, I did it twice. The first time you could argue, you know, doesn't count because I was 28 when I left the university, but I left. I quit without knowing what I was going to do. I just said, "I've loved it here, but if I don't go, I see what's going to happen, and I'm going to be stuck." The deciding when to go thing for me, that's part and parcel of it. Because we go through these phases where we think, "Is this just a rough patch?" It could be, it could be a marriage, it could be your career. It could be anything that we're talking about when you're thinking to yourself, "Do I need a change? Do I need to get out? Is it time?" So I think that we need to be thoughtful about that. I'm not saying the first time you have an argument you bail on the marriage. If we did that nobody would be married anymore, right?
So we have to be thinking about what does it look like, how do we know, when is it time? And that requires some thoughtful introspection, which is one thing that as women we don't take the time to do. To check in and say, is this serving me anymore? Is this something that I can continue to do? And the other part about it that I counsel women to do and council myself to do is to look at your energy around something. And I'm not just talking about are you enthused about it? I'm talking about are you putting yourself in. So I have something that I call all in or half assed energy. And I have found over my lifetime that there are things that I have done, maybe it's a volunteer position, maybe it's what I'm doing career wise. Maybe it's something else. And if I'm all in, you know it, you can smell it, you can see it, you can sense it. You can, you just know. And you know when your friends are all in about something, and they're like, "I can't wait to tell you about this."
Half-assed energy is when you come 10 minutes late to the meeting. You don't raise your hand, or you look down when you're taking notes because you don't want anybody to ask you to do anything extra for Pete's sake, I'm just here because I have to be or any of those types of things. We all know when we're in half-assed energy. Half-assed energy, once it's been allowed to sit for a while will spill over into other areas of your life. So if you're in half-assed energy about anything, it's time to make a decision, get in or get out, go all out and show up for the meetings on time. Stop looking for ways to half bake it or to just phone in your participation. Or say, "You know what? This has been great, I've just got to go." Also, understanding that sometimes where burnout, so it's not that like we quit on something that we've loved because we're not feeling that anymore.
So let's talk about that because that's a really big piece in what I teach with our hormonal issues, the cortisol, oxytocin connection. When we feel that, you know, resentment or that burnout, you know, just that lack luster desire to do the things that we've loved or to be with the people that we've loved. And figuring out that, you know, that resentment, lack of self care, we've got to come from a place of a cup overflowing versus, you know, like, you know, licking the bottom. So I really like this concept of all in energy or half assed energy and just that concept, okay, where's this coming from? And am I in this place of where I'm able to discern that it's because this is no longer serving me or that I'm just burnout and physiologically exhausted.
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
Right, or just done. And here's the thing, things can run their course. I think it's okay to be done with things. This is not the same hairstyle that I had my entire life. I changed how I dress.
Sheree Clark:
I love it, it's so cute. Really beautiful.
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
Oh, thank you.
Sheree Clark:
But we have to evolve. And if I try to do the things that I did at 20 and think that those are life long things that I'm going to be doing. Even if you're in a situation like a marriage where you've made a lifelong commitment and it's, you've gotten to a rough part and you're like, I'm committed to making this work in staying, you've changed, the person you're wedded to has changed and that you need to renegotiate what the terms are of making this whole thing happen. That happens with our careers, our volunteer responsibilities, even our friendships. So I believe that updating is really important. Our computer programmings, programs, we need to do install the updates and the upgrades.
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
With you on that, right? We're constantly, I would say if I'm doing the same thing tomorrow that I've done today is because I was too lazy or stupid overnight to learn a better way. But that's that overachiever side. So maybe not to that degree, but you know, we're always looking to do things differently or to have new experiences and that's a great, a great park. Give us an example of someone you've worked with that was stuck and how you worked through that.
Sheree Clark:
One of the examples that I give is me, because I have been stuck and so I can speak in the first person and answer any question that you have about it because it's happened to me before. So in that period of time, the example that I would give would be when I made the shift going from the advertising agency, which I need to tell you I was doing really well financially. We were very successful. I had written three books in that business. I was well-regarded, I flew everywhere first class and it was a great life. And my friends were like, "What are you doing? Why are you even thinking of going? What's you've got it made, I want your life." And here's the thing, somebody else wanting my life doesn't make me want it anymore.
So what I did, my first step was I sat back and this would be something I even would tell people that are tuned in for us today. That a simple, easy step that you can do that we don't do is to simply take your right hand, place it over your heart. Take your left hand, place it on top, close your eyes, take a deep breath in, and a slow exhale. And keeping your eyes closed say to yourself, "What do you want?" You're asking your heart, what do you want? And we can open our eyes now, it's as simple as that. What happens is I'm listening to the chatter of my friends saying, "Oh my God, you can't go. You're making too much money to do something else, what are you crazy?" Or, "Well, what will happen to this? What about your clients? What about your employees? What about blah, blah, blah." Forget that, this is my life, I get one. So I need to connect with what it is that I want.
That is the very first step. And it's not an easy first step, but that's just a sample. The next thing that we do is see what does that vision look like? And the thing about it is, is that we don't know. We won't know, were not going to have crystal clarity right from the get go, where you're like, "Oh bang, I'm going to do this." I didn't have it. And don't worry if you don't. But moving in that direction, allowing yourself to dream, creating a vision board, and I love to create vision boards and there's any number of resources online to learn how to do that. Writing things down, journaling. Really start exploring without editing. No shoulds, no shooting all over yourself on this. Forget what people expect, forget, oh the kids are going to, you know, they're still in high school, I can't possibly leave. Forget that. Let's just pretend that anything is available and then from there you can start to move forward, so that's the beginning steps.
And then beyond that, don't worry about, stay in the step that you're on. Just take it one step at a time, one day at a time, and don't do it alone. Find a trusted resource, find someone that can guide you, hold your hand. That might be a life coach, it might be a best friend, it might be some money that's in your care world like you, that's taking care of the body, that understands all of the challenges that we have.
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
Yeah, that's good advice. And taking that time, one of the first steps is getting in touch with what you really want, right? What you really know that you want, or a vision for the direction you'd like to start moving in. Or really recognizing that, you know, I've wanted to do this my entire life and now's the time to do it. So how do we know that it's now the time to do it?
Sheree Clark:
I have another little trick for that as well. Now that we've been inside, one of the things that I also talk about is going outside. So there's a technique that I like that I assign to many of the women that work with me when it's appropriate. And I suggest that they do informational interviews, and what that is, it's not a job interview. It's identifying someone that you look up to, we'll call them a trusted other or someone that you admire. And it might not necessarily be in your career, they might not be in your location. They might, and you might not even know them very well. It's just somebody, for some reason, you know how you have those magnetic people? And I'll say that you're one of them, that when you meet them you're like, I'll have what she's having. You know like that Harry met Sally movie. You know when you're like-
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
I love that movie.
Sheree Clark:
Me too. You're like, she's got something and I want to know more. I want a piece of that, I want to interact. So get up your bravery, reach out to the person that you admire and for you, for example, I might reach out to you and say, "You know, I have watched you for a number of years and seen you evolve, and I've seen you grow, and I've watched your message change and evolve, and you're speaking with your authentic voice, I can feel it. When you talk to me about that, because I don't know that I have my authentic voice just now, and I don't know if I know where to find it. And I really look up to you. Can we have a conversation, would you mind? I'll buy you coffee." You're going to say ...
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
Wow, yes, of course. No one's asked me that, right? Like how cool. What a great conversation to have. And I think that also the teacher and student interact, right? Because it's a constant evolution. Like you said, it's a constant process of finding that authenticity in this example, of finding that authenticity and resonating when things feel right and knowing when things feel off and that is going to change over time. So let's talk about this aging issue being post midlife, and the changes that were going through in our life. Our priorities change, so it is critical to really stand up and say, "Look, I'm not done living. I've had more of my life left ahead of me then have been before me, essentially, oftentimes."
So approaching that with confidence, instilling that desire to keep living and thriving. I mean, I really want to share that message with our listeners today because so many of them are transitioning, and it's hard. So getting the physical body straight, that's key, right? That's some of the first steps. But then also the actionable steps, the disciplines and practices that really move us into that space where we're loving the life we have created for ourselves.
Sheree Clark:
Absolutely. The thing that you hit upon that really resonates with me is the physical body and that's an essential component. When we don't feel our best, we can't be our best. We've been talking in this conversation about the things that change for us as we have been on the planet a little longer, so there are any number of things. I can't eat the way that I used to in my twenties, it just doesn't work for me anymore. I wish I could, but I can't and if I do, there's hell to pay. I gain weight, I'm bloated, I'm not regular. I feel sluggish, so the things that I could get away with then are not possible. Same thing with alcohol. I don't even want to think about what I did in my college days and now I can have one glass of wine, two is pushing it and three means I skip yoga in the morning, so it's not worth it to me.
I've never gotten up the next day and said, "Damn, I wish I'd had another cocktail." You know, that just doesn't happen. So taking care of the physical body, stop beating the crap out of ourselves. I'm not going to be a crossfit person, I am 62 years old. I can't run the way that I used to. I used to do half marathons, it doesn't serve me. So figuring out what those things are and deciding that I want to be the best I can be in this body because it makes me smarter and funnier and happier and better to be around.
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
I agree. One of my journaling questions is, what is it yesterday that I'm so glad I did? You know? Or experienced and that has really been such a great question for me and the reflection and it's, and just bringing more of those things that I'm glad I've done or I'm doing into my awareness and into my life. Like, what of all these 24 hours am I so glad I did? And I think that's like what you're saying here, is you looking at the things that do serve us and again, as you said earlier, letting go of the things that aren't serving us.
Sheree Clark:
Amen.
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
With that extra glass of wine or that cocktail or you know.
Sheree Clark:
Or saying yes when you want to say no.
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
Yeah. So you talk about celebrating the insights that our life experiences have made possible. Let's talk about that.
Sheree Clark:
Oh my gosh. Well we are sage women and one of the things that I really love about being this age is I get to be a mentor, I get to teach and leave my legacy and work with other women. Some of them younger, some of them not. Some of them I just have more experience at filling the blank, whatever that is. And I think sharing that experience is a delicious part of this time of life. That's why I love what I do career wise is I get to help women birth that new process that they're involved in. And I do it not just career wise, but as a volunteer and in my community. And when we were talking about informational interviews, I grant informational interviews to just about everybody that asks me.
Sometimes it might, I might have to schedule it a little bit out because of my, the time constraints that I have. But I don't say no because I understand, and I know what it feels like to be in that place of what am I going to do now, I'm confused, I feel lost, I feel I'm not, I'm disconnected, and it's not that hard to reconnect. It really isn't.
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
No, that's true. And you know, brings up a thought to my mind. Like what motivates us differs over our decades. It can, and so I'm curious like have you seen what motivates someone in their twenties and thirties versus someone in their fifties and sixties, and like how you coach and inspire that different?
Sheree Clark:
Well for me, I, and maybe for you too, it'd be interesting to hear your take on it. In my twenties I was motivated by I want to do more, be more, get more. I want to make my mark, I want to show that I can do it. I went from undergraduate to graduate school immediately, so I had, I had a master's degree by the time I was 23, and I wanted to make my mark, and I wanted to do all this and then I needed to, you know, make more money and get promoted. There's a cycle of that. There's nothing wrong with that, it's good energy-
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
Like a hamster wheel cycle.
Sheree Clark:
Yeah, exactly, right? And there's nothing wrong with that. It's a great thing. You've got all kinds of energy. You don't need that much sleep. You can, it's all good. And then we get a little bit older and then in our thirties we make decisions about our lives, like many get married or begin to have children. For me it was starting a business that would end up, it was like a child. It was 25 when I let it go. I bought my first house at that point in time and sold, all of these things that happened, and we can think of our, in our own timeline and maybe a listener's timeline is a little bit different. Maybe they had children later in life or whatever, but it's the same trajectory. Now at this point what I'm thinking is, you know what? I love watching. I love helping other people launch. I love seeing what's going on, I love discussion more than, and I'd love, I still love the whole concept of marathons, but I want to go and stand on the sideline and ring the cowbell for somebody else.
I don't need to run the race, I don't need to drink the goo. I'm good clapping at the end and handing out metals. So I think embracing that, and I think the sexiest women, and let's talk about this. Who-
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
Yeah, let's move to that.
Sheree Clark:
[inaudible 00:21:39] sexy. The sexiest women are the ones that recognize that where they're at is where they're supposed to be in this age. So no, I don't wear revealing, you know, things that I might have worn or could have pulled off a lot of years in my twenties, and it's not just because I think I can't, just because I could doesn't mean I should, right? It's feeling like I'm doing something that serves me, whether that's how I dress, how I present myself, what it is that I'm doing, and having the confidence to say I'm 62, I'm not 22. And there's some things about that, would I like to have some things be different? You know, a little flatter belly, sure. But not at the expense of having to be on the hamster wheel again. So love where you're at.
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
I like that. I like that a lot. I think that's so true. Thinking about what motivated me to in my twenties and thirties it was definitely the academia, the accomplishments. Just getting the discovery solution, seeing these problems solved. I mean it was nonstop, nonstop and now 52 with a 10 year old, so I've had the wide range of children are 10 to 30. So wide range of raising children, but looking at what brings me peace and joy and that centeredness, and that's what I want to do more of and that's exactly right. Watching other people discovering themselves and get off that hamster wheel. And at least you know, to be able to appreciate the moments and people that we are experiencing in our life, in our daily basis despite how you know, how busy or hectic it can be sometimes. So I think that's, that's been an interesting thing to observe.
And I think that also because of, I think of the hormonal fluctuations. In our twenties and thirties we have powerful high levels of hormones, right? So we're feeding off those hormones, and it enables us to, you know, like run that race and now in this transition we've got a rewiring, and a different balance of hormones that can settle us. And I say to really experience compassion, the peace that surpasses all understanding and a sense of appreciation and gratitude for where we are and how we are. And we have to, no matter what, like you said, acceptance, like acceptance of our body. I'm like, yeah, I could use a lift here, could use a tuck there. The acceptance of where we are right now and being okay with that. I'm like, yeah, I think that's really important. And that sets the standard for others that are coming up around us that we're mentoring, that are observing us, without us even realizing.
Sheree Clark:
We get to be the sages and the crone, and, which some people have this negative, you know, they push back like, oh, you know, whatever. I did it when I first got that AARP, you know, solicitation in the mail, and you're like, yeah, you're like, I'm not even opening that.
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
I know, right? Trash.
Sheree Clark:
That's right, throw it away. And then that feeling of loss that we have when we go to the liquor store, and they don't ask for your ID any longer, or worse when you go to the movie theater, and they try to give you the senior discount. And even if you qualify for it, there's a piece of us that want to go, "No, I will pay full price anything, please not that." But the thing about it is, its real and you can't unring the bell. This is it. This is, I was born in 1956 that's not going to change, so why not embrace it? Stop being ashamed of it. Just say, "You know what? This is me. This is me and thank you," whatever all that is, universe, God, thank you that I can be here, and I don't have to hide it or walk around trying to be something I'm not.
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
Yeah, yeah, I know, I like that. You know, your platform is Fork in the Road. How do you even know you're at a fork in the road?
Sheree Clark:
What a beautiful question. Thank you for that. So most people think of the forks in the road as being the big decisions. You know, do I stay in this marriage or do I leave it? Do I leave corporate America and start my own business? Do I downsize, move to a condo? Those are big forks in the road, but the little forks in the road are what make up our lives and those little forks in the road are the everyday decisions. Am I going to hit the snooze or go to yoga? Am I going to say yes to one more cocktail and feel like hell tomorrow morning? Am I going to actually make that appointment that I know I need to do to have my checkup or am I going to blow it off and pretend that I don't need to do that? All of those little everyday decisions are what accumulate to make up our lives.
Because at the end of the day, if you keep making the "Wrong decision," and I don't like to assess right or wrong, but let's face it, having that third cocktail seven nights in a row is not the right decision. If you start doing that, then you end up with a life that maybe you wouldn't have written the script for. So, that's where fork in the road comes from.
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
I like that. I like that, because that's a process of discernment, and I think a lot of clarity comes from being able to discern these little steps. Right? These little, I mean really these daily discernment's or these daily forks in the road, help us handle the big forks a lot better because we're really in touch with what serves us and what doesn't.
Sheree Clark:
Yeah, exactly. And just as we don't save for retirement in one day, I didn't just decide on my retirement account I'm going to take care of last Tuesday. It's a daily submission and it's the same thing with every decision that we make. Every single thing. It's all cumulative, it's a little drop in the bucket, little drop, a little drop and then pretty soon your cup is overflowing.
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
Yeah. Yeah. And that brings to one more question because you're at, you know, the fork in the road concept that it's, I just liked that so much. How do we know we're stuck versus this is something that I'm content with? I'll tell you an example. I have a friend that I grew up with from high school and I always, I bought my first plane ticket at 13, always wanting to leave town and travel. She's like, "Go? Nope, never been out of Pennsylvania. Nope, no desire to leaving from Doylestown, Pennsylvania. No desire to leave, you know, small country house." And I'm like, "No desire to leave? I mean, do you not even want to go to like Disney?" I mean like it blew my mind, right? I was like, "What?" And she said, "No, really, I don't." And I'm like thinking that just has campy.
Okay. I don't know. Like, I couldn't, you know, like I'm like, "Well, I'm going to New York this weekend, we'll be in Philadelphia, what can we do? You know, over the summer, you know, where we going?" And I just, I look back on it and thinking, wow, to have that contentment and that ability to be at peace with right where you are is a gift. And she was an artist and so maybe that was part of it. So like was she stuck? Was she not stuck? Doesn't sound like, you know, looking back I thought she was stuck, maybe not.
Sheree Clark:
What a great question. And we do this to one another. We want to help, especially people that we love, but we're applying our yardstick and our measuring, and part of it, it comes from a place of authenticity and generosity. You want her to have your experiences like, no, you've got to see how tall these buildings are in New York and you've got to know what it's like to be on a plane, and you know, whatever. All of the things that you have had, and you find joy in and wanting to share those. And like I said, that's authenticity. But when the person doesn't, I enjoy that.
Like for example, I live in a state where football is a big deal. Football bores me to tears and when my friends are like, "What? You don't ever tailgate, you never go to the game." I'm like, "Nope, not happening for this girl." And they're all about it. They want to turn me onto it and I'm like, "You know, tell me when it's over, and I'll meet you afterwards, so I can hear all about it." But, so no, I think, but I think that's a classic example of sometimes how we get in our ruts is that we start looking outside and thinking maybe I should, and that's shitting all over yourself, so don't do it.
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
I like that. Okay, we are not going to shit all of ourselves right now. That's right.
Sheree Clark:
Sure.
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
We are stopping that right now. I love that. So you have a special gift, a three video series that you have available for our audience for free. Can you talk about that Sheree and tell us where we can listen in and get that, those downloads?
Sheree Clark:
I am thrilled to share it with you. It's the embodiment of some of the tips that I've given today. So it's three tips to what I think is successful and happy life. So I begin with the visioning idea and how we get, kind of get our heads around what is it that we want. When we did that, the first exercise, this is the second step to that. The second video has to do with something that I consider a ground piece of my nutrition every day, and we talked about the physical body and how critical it is to take care of that. So the second video addresses that and then the third video addresses where I go to for help. Those of us, you and I who are helping professionals who help other women get what they want, need out of life, help them solve their problems, or put the pieces together for their puzzle, where do we go, what do we do? And I give some of my trusted resources in that, and most of them are books, but some of them are other things as well. And I'm happy to share.
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
That's excellent. Thank you. And one question I'd love to ask my guest is given, because you are, you are the epitome of like vibrancy, energy, you know, radiance. You've looked so balanced, and you just have the heart to help. So share with us a day in your life, just a glimpse.
Sheree Clark:
Oh, just a regular day? Okay, so you're going to think I'm crazy. My alarm goes off at 4:30 in the morning-
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
Yeah, you're crazy.
Sheree Clark:
And I have one of those alarm clocks, if you're going to, whatever time of day you get up, it's not a beep, beep, beep, it's not my phone. It's those, it mimics the sunrise, and I set it so that it takes the sun between 15 minutes, and a half an hour to rise, depending on what time I get to bed. It's a gentle, beautiful way to wake up. I go to yoga, I arrive in the yoga studio at 5:30 in the morning. I'm downtown, and I just saw, we would, talked about my cat Lotus. He does yoga with me. I arrive in the yoga studio and then you'll notice that I didn't say anything about Facebook or email or digital, anything. I don't do digital before 8:30, I try to do nine o'clock in the morning.
My business is primarily online. So to me, if I, the first thing I do when I get up out of the bed is look at my phone, which is I certainly use, and I'm, I do have, and it's part of my life, but if I start my day like that, I'm living my life for somebody else. So from 4:30 AM until 9:00 AM is my time. Nobody messes with it. I don't schedule appointments if I can avoid it or whatever, and then the rest of the day is, varies by the day of the week. I oftentimes will get in more physical exercise, there's a gym on the way back that I'll just oftentimes stop at after yoga and just listen to a podcast while I walk. Nothing strenuous, nothing hard, nothing, I don't do crossfit. And then I go about my day. My day, typically, I try to make it "End" at six o'clock at night, and I try not to eat really late because if I eat really late, then it's hard to get up in the morning. And who wants a belly bomb in your belly when you're trying to do yoga at 5:30 in the morning? So if you eat too late, you'll have that.
So I really just try to live a life of balance and peace that I get to write the script for. Now, that's my perfect day. Once in a while something will happen, I'll get a flat tire, or I'll discover that something is blown up or somebody will call me with bad news. But because I have those early morning hours that I'm grounded, I'm at peace, I've got my yoga, I've done all those things. When a tidal wave of, pardon my french, [beep] comes at me, I don't feel like I've been knocked off my game. That's my day.
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
Yeah. Again, no, that is so good. And I think that to emphasize that time in the morning where it is just you time is so critical and really the most successful people I know do that, and it will take hours for themselves. You know? I mean just take that time for ourselves and before we allow the interruptions of, a colleague says the inbox is always someone else's agenda, you know? So get to your agenda first and handle that and then designate these small bites of time, because I'm the most creative before I get into my inbox. Once it's in, goes away.
Sheree Clark:
That's right. And that's the time for those of you who are listening that aren't into the physical part of it, which I would suggest maybe that would be a good thing to explore. It doesn't have to be, like I said, I'm not crossfit espousing that. But journaling, prayer, meditation, planning your day. Looking to see who you might want to informational interview. Find the time that's yours and it for me, it used to be at the end of the day when I was in my twenties and what happened, typically somebody would say, "Hey, you want to catch a drink after work?" Or something would happen that I had to stay at work and work later, or something always happens. But this way it's mine, and I filled my cup first and then I've got plenty from which to serve others.
Dr. Anna Cabeca:
Yup. Well I second that, that is great. Well I want to thank you so much Sheree for being with us today. And for our listeners you can also find Sheree on Facebook. Her Facebook name is Fork Roads. If you go to facebook.com/forkroad, you can find her there as well. And then the URL for her three video series is whattheforkareyouwaitingfor.com/gift. So, and we'll put that in the show notes as well. So again, Sheree, thank you so much for joining us today and sharing your wisdom. I look forward to many more open on his conversations with you. Thank you.
Sheree Clark:
Thank you back at you.
